It is common for addicts to blame their partners for their inability to perform.
In the book When preparing for real sex, the pornified brain fails to get its dopamine surge and the signal to the penis is too weak to achieve erection.
Many men describe it as feeling “numb.” Like any addict, a porn addict will begin to revolve his life around the next buzz.
Check your husband’s web browsers on his phone, laptop, home computer, or tablet. Many men, and an increasing percentage of women, are finding themselves helpless in the face of Internet temptations.After years of porn viewing, often starting at a young age, what started as a curiosity became a pattern, which became a habit, which became a compulsion.When you walk into the room where your husband sits at the computer, does your he suddenly get nervous or make knee-jerk reactions?When you ask what he has been doing online, does he become defensive or easily irritated?He called this the “Triple-A Engine.” The last factor, anonymity, is key.A man’s belief that no one knows where he is going online gives a false sense of security: “What I’m doing online is my own business, and it isn’t hurting anyone else.” The more a man becomes entrenched in porn, the more he begins to lose interest in real world relationships, especially with his wife and children.These are huge red flags and one of the clear signs of porn addiction.A porn user almost always has dysfunctional relationship to technology—many hours spent online alone, often at odd hours or at times when they should be spending time with their families and friends.While many addicts want a high frequency of sex (see #3), as the addiction escalates, they begin to lose interest in their partner.They become desensitized to other forms of pleasure—even sexual intercourse—preferring the buzz they get from porn.